Sunday, September 9, 2007

Second Thoughts

I'm regretting this.

What a stupid idea.

I know by now that no outside force exists that can make me "shift" into healthy eating patterns again. It has to come from deep within myself. I can't guilt myself into it, embarrass myself into it, scare myself into it, or anything else.

It's just not happening right now.

My body is dead-set on self-destruction at the moment.

Excuse me while I go pour a bowl of Cheerios and drown them with sugar.

2 comments:

Alex Iskold said...

Just drink water when you get hungry it will fill you up. TV is another thing that helps :)

I have no will myself, I am good at giving advice.

Alex

Lisa said...

Thank you, Alex. Drinking water is important, I know.

Unfortunately, it's not about feeling full for me. I rarely feel full, no matter how much food I eat, because I do not eat out of hunger. I eat from addiction - to quiet my emotions... to numb myself out so I don't have to feel something.