I think that deciding to blog about the food thing is aiding in my resolve; I've wanted to ditch this project several times today already, but I felt embarrassed to quit before I've begun.
When I woke, I felt exhausted and I had a headache; probably the result of my late-night snacking on potato chips (a rare treat around here) and low-fat ice cream drowning in chocolate syrup and covered with peanuts. After getting my oldest out the door for school, I went back to bed.
I don't care, I thought.
When I got up the second time, after a fitful sleep full of very strange dreams, including a recurring frustrating sex episode where I keep getting interrupted, I almost reached for the sugar cereal because it was quick and mindless. But I forced myself to make a good breakfast (well, what I know works for my body, anyway).
Here's what I had:
One slice of whole wheat toast (real whole grain, not the fake stuff) with some spray butter
One container of Weight Watchers yogurt
10-12 raw almonds
One huge glass of water
One multi-vitamin
One fish-oil supplement
One calcium supplement
Then I sat down to begin this blog.
About an hour ago, I ate this:
One piece of low-fat string cheese
One small green apple
Water
And now, I have a splitting headache, and I desperately want a cookie.
I'm breaking out in a sweat; I can't focus. My head is pounding and I'm tired and sleepy.
I warned the kids already (the two who haven't yet started school) that today was going to be a lazy, do-nothing day, just so they aren't expecting much from me. I've done this a hundred times; I know the drill. I will be nasty and cranky. I am disgusted with myself, and I will try to take it out on them.
I did manage to get a load of laundry in, and, of course, I'm blogging. I won't let myself lie around all day, but at some point, it will be very tempting.
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1 comment:
I admire you! Stay the course. It is very hard the first couple of days! I know because like you I started over and over again. I will start again soon.
BUT, my wish for you is to keep a focus on your goal.
I would say 'don't do nothing.' Do something to distract yourself. Go in the yard. Take the kiddies for a walk. Walk!
Go to the mall. Walk around the mall and other people. Sit there and people watch for an hour.
Take care!
Adrienne Zurub
Author,
'NOtes From the Mothership ~ The Naked Invisibles'
http://chasewunderlickpublishers.com.cn
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